Thursday, June 30, 2011

Throwback Thursday: Club Phat

This Throwback is brought to you by guest TIOJ-er Grace:

Remember 2000? It was a heady time for me; deflated Y2K didn't destroy most of civilized infrastructure, I dragged 25 sacks of rice from my family's makeshift underground shelter back to Wal-Mart's return line. But there was more to that glorious turn-of-the-century year. It was the year in which I exerted independence over my dictatorial parents and began, with my loyal (well, as loyal as 11-year-old girls can be) krew, to take suburban Buffalo by storm. Did you really think Rebecca Black pioneered preteen/teen partying on Fridays?

For the "it" crowd at Heim Middle School, Friday nights were the domain of the illustrious preteen Club Phat. Club Phat was a middle schooler's den of iniquity, hidden innocently behind the facade of our town's community center. Admittedly, my memories of middle school are painfully selective, but I choose to remember my Club Phat days as such: less me standing awkwardly alone in the corner, tugging at my too-small Limited Too shirt, readjusting my glasses, and more me exposing my butterfly clip-wearing, innocently cell phone-free posse to the high-class world of exclusive, VIP-only events filled with beautiful and important people. We paid our $5 to get a stamp on our hands. We sat next to our boy "friends" on the (almost certainly) filthy couches. We loudly rapped to disturbingly inappropriate music. Our parents picked us up at 9:45pm. Oh, but those 2.75 hours of freedom!

This song, along with family-friendly classics from Ludacris ("What's Your Fantasty?") and Nelly ("Country Grammar"), defined my middle school experience. There's nothing like bumping-and-grinding with a prepubescent 11-year-old boy while the lyric "gimme that funk, that sweet, that nasty, that gooshy [sp?] stuff" blasts in your naive ears.


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